'oh! next year?!'

it's been a while since i've heard from my publisher, but i have it on good authority that they've had a crazy couple of weeks, so i've stopped short on coming up with my own conspiracy theories. i have been in touch with my editor to check if they meant it when they said 'if you want to talk about anything, if you want to show me some writing, just contact me'. turns out that the words were sincere (and why wouldn't they be?), so i emailed them a list of ideas and concepts for the final draft. i can't wait to see the last reader's report, either; i have a feeling i'll really be able to get my teeth into that one.   
 
i remember buying a book once when i was bookstore browsing in sydney. i bought a book called '1,818 ways to write better and get published'. there was a checklist of common misconceptions of writers, writing and publishers/editors in there. books like that help, but it's just so much better when someone who's been there before decides to share their experiences. that's one of the best things that's come of this whole experience - obviously, the getting published bit is quite amazing also - though that won't be 'real' for me for quite a while yet. fact of the matter is that the book will most probably be out next year some time - late next year. publication takes 9 months from when the manuscript is finalised.
 
it kinda shits me when i have to explain this to people - which is one of the reasons i haven't been telling everyone as yet. i watch their excitement turn to slight disappointment as they frown and go 'oh! next year?!' i feel like coming back with 'yeah, unfortunately it'll take me that long to get the cash together to pay them to publish me'. cause that's what it feels like they're thinking when they react like that (or maybe that's just the conspiracy theory centre of my brain overcompensating, seeing as it's pretty much banned from creating scenarios that have to do with publishers/editors sniggering as they roast a little me-shaped voodoo doll over an open fire). i feel like saying, 'look, can we just cut to that part where you say 'oh wow!' and leave it at that? cause when you look doubtful, i start to think i made the whole thing up, and have a blinding urge to throw myself infront of a tram'. or something.
ah. well. to lighten the mood, here is an extract from '1,818 ways to write better and get published'.
 
some common misconceptions about writers and writing

• a writer must suffer
• writers must reach deep (or as deeply as possible) into their souls when they write
• writers are cerebral, intellectual people - probably even eggheads
• writing is a noble act
• writers are wise
• writers are unhappy
• you must bare your soul in everything you write
• you must be completely free of distraction and interruption to write well
• the only good reason to write is to make money
• making money is not a good reason to write
• all writers are a little bit (or more than a little bit) crazy